matchmakers, clean hair, and a discovery

Question. Is seven hour-long episodes of Millionaire Matchmaker too many to watch back-to-back? I think not. I'd call it good career training. If the photography/writing/editing thing doesn't pan out, as of yesterday, I am fully qualified to become a professional matchmaker. 

Hey, what's a girl to do when she's stuck inside her daughter's bare-bones work apartment with a bad cold and no crafting materials available? While watching, I managed to delete 1,214 photographs, process a couple hundred photos, write my next DMN column (which is due next Monday, so I'm waaay ahead of schedule), and to accidentally shampoo my hair four times in a row during one commercial break. That show has ridiculously long commercial breaks. If you timed it right, you could give birth without missing a second.

The hair  SNAFU was not my fault. It's what happens when you don't have your reading glasses and are faced with unfamiliar product in a poorly lit shower. First I shampooed. Then I slathered on what I thought was conditioner only to discover it was body wash. So I did another light shampoo so the body wash wouldn't leave any weird residue. Done. That's three. Then I slathered on a huge clump from the bottle clearly marked conditioner, only to perceive, upon closer inspection, that it said shampoo and conditioner in one. That's four. I'm now sporting what is possibly the cleanest hair in America.

As far as the column goes, I made an important discovery. After eight months of nervously slogging away, undergoing at least one identity crisis per column, I finally realized how to do it easily with no stress. I simply pretend that I am writing something that I will immediately  crumble up and toss into the trashcan. I mean, truly convince myself of this and believe it. Wallah. No more nerves. Writing this column was the most fun, and I ended up with something I'm really happy with. Who knew? Forest Gump was right. Life is like a box of chocolates.